Moms' Talk: When Dad Gets Involved

 At first glance it is hard not to think that Robert Strauss’ newly released book “Daddy’s Little Goalie” is anything but a sports book.  First off, there is the title, then the subtitle “A Father, His Daughters & Sports,” and the cover art of a mitt cradling a ball, a bat, a pink baseball cap, pink soccer ball and yes, the required cleats.

Yet upon close inspection and a thorough read it is clear, this book is about much more than just sports

At the heart of the book, it is really about Strauss’ relationship with his two daughters, soon-to-be high school junior, Sylvia and college sophomore, Ella.  Since Strauss spent many years as a reporter at Sports Illustrated it comes as no surprise that sports was a focal point of this relationship.

“It’s more a parenting book than a sports book,” says Strauss.  “I don’t think they (readers) should be looking for tips on sports, even though my older daughter got recruited for college sports… She never went where she was recruited, but that’s neither here nor there,” adds Strauss.

It is exactly this kind of attitude Strauss shows throughout his book.  It’s great that his girls took up basketball, soccer, lacrosse and crew but he looked at all their athletic endeavors as a learning experience and wasn’t all that concerned or fixated on whether they won or lost.

As a sports fanatic and a sport writer on top of that, he said he certainly thinks he approached his girls and sports very differently than he would have if he had had boys.  “I certainly would have been more angst ridden about their performance, I think,” he says.  For him, “the girls’ participation was great, no matter how good they were,” he says.

For his girls and all girls, really, “Sports as a competition may not be all that important, but I think being healthy is,” Strauss’ reflects. “What this has done, this revolution of girls’ sports, at least it has done one positive thing, it has made more fit young women today, hopefully.   And hopefully my kids will be two of those fit young women!”

Since sports were an integral part of the Strauss household, this book focuses on a father’s relationship with his daughters with sports as a backdrop.

 “What I want (my readers) to go away with is that you should be involved, but realize that you’re involved.  Not just sort of do it without thinking about it,” explains Strauss.

He says as he wrote the book he thought, “How funny this is to be a parent.”

“I would suspect most of us still think we’re still 18! We should all be able to step back and look at all the good or funny or sentimental things.  So, in a way, it’s made me realize that everybody should, not write a book, but everybody should write down all their “stuff” as their kids are growing up,” he adds. 

He does admit that your children may not really care about what you think in the here and now, but they will appreciate it later on.

“Your childhood is so malleable that it’d be nice to look back and say ‘this is what my parents thought, what they really thought, this is part of my growing up.’”

“In a way when I really reflect on it, yeah, I wrote it for me, but I also wrote it for my kids and their kids and my family so that they know that I just didn’t do things by the seat of my pants, randomly.  Even if I didn’t think about it when I did it I certainly reflected upon it as I did it."

And how do Ella and Sylvia feel about a book devoted to their youth?

“As of this moment they haven’t read it,” he said.  “They know a lot of what’s in it because their friends or their friends’ parents have now read it.”

Now that his older daughter, Ella, is home from college she plans to read it, Strauss says.  “What she thinks is that she’ll be a little embarrassed by some of the things, but not mortified.”

Strauss will be at R. J. Julia Thursday evening, May 12, 2011 7:00 p.m.