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Live in the Present Moment

When we live in the present moment, all aggression will slip away. You'll have no need for it.

The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.

 

 

Buddhist Quote


I wrote a recent post about The Dog Whisperer.  I watched an episode a couple weeks ago and each time I watch I’m continually surprised at Cesar Millan’s language.  He understands that dogs react to their owner’s energy.  One of his favorite quotes from the show is:

Be calm and assertive.

In the episode I watched Bulldog on Edge, Cesar used the phrase:
When we live in the present moment the aggression will go away.

See?  If dog owners anticipate trouble, if we show fear, the dog will pick up on that behavior and reflect it back in their attitude.  It’s that way with people to people interaction as well.  Remember my post called Interchangeable Pawns where I relayed the definition of Transference?  That’s what happens when your dog reflects back your attitude, your behavior.  It’s the same when someone says something negative.  Ninety percent of the time what someone said to you it’s really something they are dealing with.

It’s their issue and they can’t admit it to themselves so they throw the behavior onto someone else.  They transfer it.  If you’re living in the present moment you can let these slights wash away.  You can learn to accept that what is said to you in a negative manner is simply a reflection of the instigator.  Once you master the game, nothing will stick.  You’ll become teflon.

Dogs, people, friends will realize your new strength and will act accordingly.  I can give a strong example.  Remember my post Unexpected Friendships?  Dingo our family dog that my brother, Jay rescued from Cape Cod would take advantage of everyone who walked her.  She would drag everyone to the middle of the road.  Dingo understood she was queen.  Everyone bowed down.  When I walked her, she ALWAYS behaved.  She walked on the far left side of the road.  She did so from the first time I walked her.

Why?

Because I trained her to do so.  If she didn’t behave I turned around and brought her home.  When she attempted to drag me to the middle of the road, I calmly brought her back to the side and made her sit.  We didn’t move again until she understood that I wasn’t going to be taken advantage of.  Dingo learned early that I was in control not her.  She respected me and therefore she listened to me.

I never showed anger or fear in her presence.
I praised her when she listened, when she behaved.
I stopped what I was doing with her when she didn’t behave.

Dingo learned quickly that I was in control not her.  That’s why I could walk her properly when no one else could.

If I didn’t stay calm and assertive, if I didn’t stay in the present moment with Dingo, she would have done the same to me as she did to everyone else.  I expected to have an owner/dog experience with Dingo, not a dog/owner experience.  Because I envisioned that experience, that’s the relationship we had. I believe now more than ever before, after watching The Dog Whisperer, that as Cesar says at the start of each episode:
“I rehabilitate dogs; I train people.”

I sincerely believe that.  I have the experience to back it up with Dingo.

Anyone else want to comment on a similar theme?  Would love to hear from you.

Be Happy!  Be Well!  Be Positive!
Blessings to you.

Chris

Feel free to comment here on Patch or jump on over to my blog:
Live in the Present Moment 

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tom burland May 22, 2013 at 06:17 am
It was most likely picked to be smack in the middle of the most tick infested area of the park.Read More The town does not own the farm land closest to 95, it is owned by a private citizen
JC May 21, 2013 at 05:38 pm
The area north of the farm house across Copse would not have been my first pick. There must be aRead More reason for picking that spot? but, looking at satellite images, if the town owns the land abutting 95 (is that also part of the farm?), it would make more sense to place it in that lower section of the park as it would not be near as many residential homes. The interstate is already noisy and would mask the occasional yip and yap on Saturdays or weekday summer evenings before sunset. I also wonder about the cliffs acting as sound amplifiers? I know, it sounds nuts but, you need to check or, yikes. You want to spend the most time on location work and design. Hopefully the UConn students have an architecture professor leading on the design work?
JC May 21, 2013 at 05:25 pm
I have lived all over the U.S. in areas with dog parks. All were fenced (99% of dog parks ARE fencedRead More and any that are not should be avoided!) All have an area for big dogs, plus an area for little dogs, and an area for "problem" dogs and dog training (reservation based or first come). All three areas are divided by interior fences or located in different sections. Dog parks create no problems at all if built right and managed right. All dogs MUST have a licence and rabies tag on a collar. All dogs must be neutered over 8 months of age. All owners (18 and older) must observe the dog at all times and PICK UP when a gift is left. No children under 12. If your dog was not properly socialized or is an untested aggressive breed, keep them at home until you are sure they are good citizens with strangers and dogs. Only happy dogs who get along with other dogs should EVER visit a dog park. Puppies also should stay away until they are a few months old. Very small toy dogs don't need a dog park and are best kept away. But all the parks I have used were not a problem at all. It is also important to have some parking, seating (benches), and shelter for humans and a bulletin board with rules at the entrance (double gate at each). Some parks are free to town/county residents. Some were owned by the town/county but run by volunteers (these were the best!). Most charged nothing but one charged way too much per year (it was owned and partly run by the county with volunteers). I think any of these combinations could work but, if a yearly permit is issued (proven you have rabies shot, etc.), the fee, if any, should be very low. $10 or less for dogs under 25 lbs and $15 or less for dogs 26 lbs and larger. It should pay for upkeep and poop pickup bags. Why so low? Because it is a park for dogs! Grass, dirt, and some trees. Not the Opera or a Rolling Stones concert. A volunteer group needs to raise money first. It takes a few years and longer than you think. Starting with finding a location acceptable to all (nearly impossible due to NIMBY types but doable - Baur is actually a good pick) and hiring a landscape architect (pro bono hopefully) to design/lay it out to town code. There are many dog parks all over the U.S. that are proven and work well. Madison and this part of CT do need more fenced dog parks.